Dishes are piling up, bills are past due, the kids won’t quit fighting, and you have a killer headache from the long day at work. You just can’t seem to get a firm grip on the challenges presented to you. Anxiety starts creeping its sickening, stomach turning poison into every last nerve you have left. It seems as though the harder you try to grasp control of your life, something else jumps right in the way of it.
Life is not always fair. This is something just about everyone, of every age, can agree with. Not only being responsible for yourself, but for your children as well amplifies this feeling considerably. What single parent has time or energy left after days such as these to focus on their own needs? On the rare occasion that you can find five minutes alone to just calm down, your mind still comes up with ten thousand other things you could have been doing for those five minutes you so selfishly wasted. This is a major mistake most parents make; not taking enough time to themselves!
Under no circumstances should any parent, or anyone at all for that matter, feel guilty for taking “me-time”. As long as the short term responsibilities are taken care of, by all means sit down, swallow an aspirin and relax. Those dishes can wait another ten minutes for you to find your sanity, I promise you that.
It’s safe to say that most families have somewhat of a schedule (which is HIGHLY recommended), it may not be set in stone, but at least an outline of one. Think about a time of day that nothing is going on and pencil in quality time with yourself. Spend the time doing something you enjoy whether it’s watching an episode of True Blood on HBO or reading a few chapters out of the new book you bought last week. Sketch an idea for your next painting, or maybe even listen to some soothing music. No matter the activity, as long as it is relaxing for you, it works.
To make this work, timing is the key. I find that either during naptime or right after bedtime is perfect for me. The best way succeed is making sure that everything is done before your “me-time”, that way when your designated time slot approaches, you won’t have to feel guilty for relaxing.
Without quiet time, you will become a ticking time bomb of stress just waiting to combust, and that is not healthy for anyone. As the old saying goes, “If mamma isn’t happy, no one’s happy”. The rules still apply.
Waking up too early
Maybe we can sleep in
I’ll make you banana pancakes
Pretend like it’s the weekend now
- Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson
I absolutely love your blog! Although I don’t have kids myself I know it can be a struggle sometimes. My mom is also a single mother and she tries very hard to meet all of her children’s needs first and rarely takes “me time”. I think that everyone needs me time in order to function properly and not go off the edge. From experience it’s much better to have a relaxed mom than one that’s wants to bite your head off. I love how you wrote your blog and the word choices. I can’t wait to read more from you!
ReplyDeleteKelly McCorkle
Your blog is reality, it doesn’t candy coat how easy the job of a mother is like some TV shows seem portray it. Though I haven’t experienced being a mother myself yet, I certainly know the feeling of a being the child in a single parent home. My mother is the strongest women I know, she certainly doesn’t have all the money in the word, but I have always came home to a loving household, with delicious cooked meals, and memories to last me a life time. I think your blog is an amazing topic, and everyone could take away a few things from it to help appreciate moms a little more.
ReplyDeleteReading your blog made me realize that mothers arent completely cool and collectize. As you said in your blog they juggle all these things and then have to deal wiht thier kids. Not saying thats a bad thing but mothers do need time from everything in thier lives. I bug my mother to no end but when she has a book in one hand and a wine glass in the other I know to retreat and leaver her alone. Your blog helps me see the other side of the coin of parenting.
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